Heading for the wonder land

Rushed post alert but I just couldn’t bring myself to not join in another week. So excuse the ramble aka hummingbird on speed-esque writing this week.

The past week has been super hectic to say the least, hence no posts last week. I was on the killer early morning shift at work and had a million things to do after work, and then trying to force myself to sleep by 10 to be up at 4. It was just one of those weeks where I could not be any gladder to see the back end of.

The weekend came around and that too was so chocker block, but including a lot of fun and laughter. Catching up and spending a really lovely evening and morning with my ever lovely, long time friend Miss LG from Family of Killers. We had a fab night in Melb city, and it was just nice to chill some. Sunday came around with more catch ups and appointments and I am seriously just as exhausted as the last before I even properly start my week.

My running around and endless appointments are not all fruitless though. This time next week we will be packing our bags up from Bangkok and heading to INDIA, New Delhi to begin with.

We will be arriving quite late Monday night and hitting the ground running nice and early Tuesday morning ready to start a wonderful adventure, of this I have no doubt.

I’m not sure just how prepared I am for what I am sure is going to be something completely unforgettable. I have heard so many stories, amazing tales of colours and sounds and buildings and culture, and then of course some not so fabulous stories. Those i’m trying not to think about though. I have had so many vaccinations though, I think, if I do happen to get anything, I’ll be the un luckiest gal on the planet!

I just can’t wait to see it all, to immerse myself in this far away culture, to dance in the street, to eat amazing food and to photograph one of the world’s seven wonders, the Taj Mahal. I have been told that the fog surrounding it can be quite overwhelming, but you know what. I don’t think its going to be possible to ruin the amazement that will be in front of my eyes.

We are also going on a jungle safari which will see us spying some tigers in the wilderness and I believe we also get to ride a elephant at some stage, which although I have done before in Thailand, it will be just as mind blowing the second time, the enormity  of those animals really wows me.

Its going to be a full on 8 days in India and then a few days down time in Bangkok city and then onto the beautiful island of Koh Samui then back to Bangkok for a few more days… then home..

I can’t even imagine what the next 3 weeks has in store for J and I, but I can tell you, I am completely and utterly excited and that’s definitely weighing out the slight trepidation that comes and goes.

Three weeks of seeing things I’ve dreamt of, places that I’ve seen in movies and travel shows and yearned to go to. I’m going to be living it.

I’ve also been scrubbing up on some photography tidbits too, I need to be able to snap it like the best of them. I can only try right?.. Putting that DSLR to good use.

Its going to be around 35-40 degrees Celsius in India, so here is hoping I haven’t melted into a giant puddle and I do actually return at some stage!

I will hopefully be able to whip up a blog post or two and most definitely post photos, I can’t wait to share my stories and photos with you. So very very excited!

Linking in with Jess for IBOT, scoot on over and check out some more lovelies.

When the world goes silent

If you’ve even been thrown into a completely different country, with a completely different language, this may resonate with you.

In August 2008, I made a leap and moved to Switzerland to be an Au Pair for 4 young girls. It was a decision made on a bit of a whim but one that’s proved forever fruitful.

On days I reminisce, I come across things that I’ve forgotten to think about for a while and it pleases me so, that I have all these wonderful memories and that I can reach into my mind and re live them whenever I choose.

After a most amazing night out on Friday night with some lovely blogging gals the topic came up of learning languages in the car on the way home.

I shared my story with the girls, and now I’m sharing with you.

As mentioned above, I moved to Switzerland in August 2008, into a French speaking region, Lausanne. I had minimal French under my belt due to 3 years ‘learning’ French at high school and my friends and I ALWAYS proclaiming “As if we will ever need this” (well I’ve sure learnt NOT to say/think that again) So, I had about enough as to tell everybody what my name is, that I am an Au Pair and that I like the swimming pool and post office. So as awesome as my 3 sentences were, this didn’t really assist me with understanding or being able to do ANYTHING solo on my own without looking like I was in a game of charades. (I had to explain to someone that I went horse riding on my holidays one day early on in my travels, now you don’t need help with understanding how funny that looked, in the middle of a pub, all eyes on me…)

As you can imagine, the world turned very different, very quickly. I was scared shirtless at the beginning thinking I would most certainly freak out because I hardly knew a single word. How would I ever cope, was the main thought on my mind.

But then it happened… Peace happened, a kind of peace you would never ever think possible happened. The world was quiet..

It was such an enlightening experience, the fact that I couldn’t understand anyone, made life pretty sweet. I had time with my own thoughts, no one to interrupt. I had time to ponder every single thing, in my own time, because I could. I wasn’t subconsciously trying to listen to every conversation around me, as we do here, in our English speaking country, everyday, whether we realise it or not. I was just doing my thing, with only my own thoughts to worry about.

This immense calmness just enveloped me. And I was seriously on cloud 9. I would just wander around the city taking everything in, like I was a child, because I didn’t have words to distract me.

I learnt a lot about myself then, the internal conversations I had with were so amazing and un interrupted, sometimes I dream for that time again. Bliss.

My magically loud yet personally silent world came to a massive halt the day I started understanding. I remember those few weeks where my silent world was loudly interrupted, and it HURT, my brain was constantly buzzing, because I was picking up words here there and everywhere, and concentrating so hard on what the words were. I remember the constant headache I had, how I seemed to shy away from those city visits because it was just exhausting. How I would dream to go back to the apartment and sit there in proper silence because I couldn’t cope with this unnerving noise.

As the days went by this got progressively easier, the headaches subsided and the noise balanced out. This was all a result of it becoming easier to understand French and easier to speak it, it was slowly becoming the normal. It became the same crazy busy world as it is now for me in Melbourne and my silent world, was gone. Forever.

I’ll never forget those early days where I was a stranger in the world, where the silence eased me and soothed my soul, those few weeks I won’t experience again, but they will also, never leave my mind.

Tuesday = community love, linking in with Mrs IBOT herself, Jess at Diary of a SAHM

A box of treasure

I’ve been sitting here starring at that blinking curser for god knows how long. The thing is, it’s not writers block, and it’s not for lack of knowing what I want to write about,  Its more the fact, how do I put words down to paper to express exactly what I want to write. How do I explain how it feels when someone you know and someone you love has basically lost their mind and become a shell of their former person.  How does one ever understand or cope with or reason with – Alzheimer’s .

I don’t think I ever could put it into words, so best not I even try.. so instead what I would like to share is this:

My Nanna lives in England, and obviously, I and my family live here in Australia. It’s because of this reason I have loved Christmas and big occasions oh so much. At Christmas time and some Easters and some birthdays, my Nanna came to visit us. My Aunt and Uncle also make the Christmas trip over from whatever country they are in at the time. We would have a massive “proper” Christmas lunch (the only way I know with turkey and pork and ham and lots of roasted veggies and of course my Mums famous TRIFLE *drool*) and then all play cricket and swim in the pool all afternoon. Of course this is Melbourne weather depending!

This was and is my favourite time of the year, ask anyone I know. We all sang together while putting the trimmings on the tree and all famously sat around in a circle while I ceremoniously handed out the gifts..etc etc.

But of course, there was always a time when my Nanna and other family members had to leave, and I would be devastated, especially as a child. Back then, England was universes away, literally impossible to comprehend as a 5/6/7/8 year old.

My brother and I would always write my Nanna a goodbye card, and birthday / Easter card. My mum being the craft teacher/guru she is, must have instilled this trait in us, cards, letters, drawings. You name it, we did it and a lot of the time sent them on to our Nanna along with photos and even sometimes some scratch and sniffs ha ha ha (remember those!)

These cards and letters and the like, I haven’t thought of in a long time… until now.

My mum sent a giant box of things over from my Nanna’s house in England this week, a box full of a lifetime of memories and apparently it’s nothing compared to what my mum and aunt have found.

Turns out, every one of those letters, every one of those photos and every single one of those cards we have sent my Nanna, you guessed it, she has them still. She has kept the most amazing things from our childhood and also my mum’s childhood. She had them all in her bedroom, stored away nicely. I guess to go through on a rainy day and to reminisce about another time.

My mum has sent me a few things, things she thought I would like to see again and things my Nanna won’t be able to comprehend again.

She has even got, and this one made my eyes well up like no mans business, the letter my dad wrote after my brother was born in 1982, expanding on their brief phone call they had (which back then for international would of cost an arm and a leg) telling her about the tests they had done on him as a new born and how he passed with flying colours and how he “the baby is beautiful”. She had that, in her box of goodies, and it made my heart cry out in joy and sink in sorrow within the same breath.

Its amazing that we get to see these things again, but its heart breaking at the same time.

Sometimes it’s hard to think about someone getting old, someone losing their memory, someone losing their former spirit, Alzheimer’s.  But, I am grateful my Nanna is still here. She is living and loving and laughing and although her memory and a few other cognitive processes may be failing, I know she is in there somewhere, the feisty stubborn, big hearted, only ever a skirt wearing woman that we’ve always known and loved….

These are just two of the things I found in the box of never ending, heart warming, treasures.

I would take a guess of the ages I was when I did them, the first I would have been about 7/8 and the second one I would hazard a guess at about 12/11. Don’t worry, I know how to spell AWESOME now!

                         

~ Linking in with Jess for IBOT – there’s a LOT of awEsome going on over there ~

On a mission

I have been job hunting and career hunting like a crazy lady, I have been true to my pursuit of “there’s something better out there”. Nothing has been fruitful as yet; however it has not dampened my spirits. I know there is something out there, whether it takes me a few weeks or a few months, i’m going to keep on searching, searching till I find that ‘perfect job’.

The downside to this at the moment is I am analysing everything. Every. Single. Thing. And it’s actually really frustrating me. Yep, that’s right I’m annoying myself.  I hear an add on the radio and I’m thinking to myself,” I wonder if I want to work in radio, I wonder what kind of radio, would I like to be a host or a assistant or..”. Then I see someone drive past me with their own business name scrawled on their car panels, and I’m thinking “I wonder if I should start a home business, what will I call it, I wonder if that names taken”.. And so it goes on and on.

I just can’t seem to switch off from it, which in one way it’s great, as it means I am not being complacent in my pursuit, but it also means, I’m constantly exhausting myself thinking of every little thing and scenario and job possibility.

Maybe I should start looking outside the box, I am yet to consider such things as Lion tamer, Play School presenter, abseiling window cleaner, the list really does go on…..

What would be your ideal job?

Be it extravagant, real life or just something you’ve always dreamed of.

Linking in with Jess for IBOT this week – Jump over and read some others!

Physical Physical I want to get PHYSICAL.. I think.

I hope everyone now has that song in their head the same as had all weekend!! Suckers!

On Saturday morning I was  having a nice twitter conversation with some lovely ladies, which somehow turned from reading books to ‘Planking’ and how one very crazy little lady *ahemcoughyouLyndalcough* is quite partial to the odd ‘plank’.

                                    No this kind!

Now before you get ahead of yourself, this isn’t planking in the form of laying horizontal on top of a giant M for McDonalds sign or strewn across the front of a Mack Truck. This is the fitness plank we are on about, the one where the Mr Fitness Guy/Gal makes you perch on your toes and your elbows until you feel like you are about to die in about 60 second increments. Subsequently the next day, you continue this feeling and try to refrain from smiling, coughing, loud talking or any kind of activity that may put some stretch on your abs. Because it damn well HURTS!

                         This kind!

While we all agree here Lyndal is quite possibly ‘cray cray’ this brought me to the fact that this lil lady must be some sort of super fit, to enjoy to any extent doing a ‘plank’. This then brought me to my next thought which was, I want to be plank crazy TOO, I want to make people cringe at the thought I actually would love to plank, that I’m so into planking, you won’t recognise me if I’m NOT PLANKING.. ok ok, might have gone slightly overboard, but I think you get it. I want to be CRAY CRAY too.

I’ve read people clocking in their running miles a lot lately too and I am jealous, but at the same time, I’m reading them while popping a Cheezel into my trap, so it’s a bit of a catch 22. To give up the Cheezel or to be a planking/running/fitness goddess, tough choice.

But…I want to get fit ya’ll.

So, although I won’t be going all gung ho about it, I am going to start building myself up, I’m going to dust off my sneakers that seemed to have magically stuffed themself to the far end of my closest (honest no idea how, they just needed a ‘nap’ I guess) and put on my fave Bonds jogging pants and sloppy joe hoodie and I’m set.

The weather is warming up, which is going to help immensely, I’m not a fan at ALL of freezing my caboose off in the name of Le Arse Irresistible, so I didn’t and I won’t. But when that chill has blown back to the north pole, I will be hitting that asphalt like no mans business, whether it be taking a stroll with my man to and along the beach to watch the sunset or doing the evening jog past the football oval (because the bright lights make things less spooky), i’m gunna DO IT!

I’m less of a gym kinda gal and more of a walk, jog run solo kinda gal, so that’s where I will begin. Follow me, keep me accountable but please don’t yell if I pause for a Cheezel every now and then.

And PLANK on people PLANK ON.

        Not sponsored –                            I just HEART Cheezels

Taking a leap of sorts.

Beautiful Blue Wren I snapped in Daylesford,                                                                          after this photo – he took a leap, back into the great unknown.

Sometimes stability and a safety net isn’t all it’s cracked up to be if your not happy. Sometimes knowing at the end of the month you will have money and you will be able to pay your bills isn’t everything if your not happy. Granted, its what majority of us want and need but in my case this is not my everything right now, because I’m not happy.. I want to be happy everyday leading UP to pay day, not just on the day itself; I want to wake up every morning with a smile on my dial excited to be alive and happy to see the sunshine. Lately this isn’t happening, lately I find myself more often than not ready to burst into tears when my alarm goes off. Not exactly an idea situation. My job is just mundane and boring and I am not learning anything new anymore, nor am I giving anything back to society. I’m just a number in a line of people, a number I don’t want to be anymore.

Thing is, I have been saying this for a while and I have been looking at other jobs and I even got offered a role the other week but it was for a lesser role in a smaller company with a drop in pay. Now, money isn’t everything but I am not stupid, I have said to myself that when I am moving on from this job, as hideous as I find it, it will be for a step up in the corporate ladder. Not sideways or down.

So, instead of talking about it, and whinging about it and making myself more miserable, what I have been doing the past week is putting myself out there, I have been calling on all my contacts within the business and the companies we work with, I have been sticking my neck out, telling them what I’m interested in and telling them what I am good at etc etc (this may have included me putting ‘yoddling’ down as one of my point forms… eye catching yes?) . Because let’s face it, sitting there whinging isn’t going to get me anywhere fast. It’s time to take a leap.

I’m not sure as yet what my ideal life job is, maybe I don’t have one, and maybe I am destined to roam and take a few jobs and learn some new skills and sway between here and Switzerland and just be a nomad. So, right now, although none of these jobs are my minds “ideal” jobs, they are good jobs and they are seemingly interesting, and while I’m still trying to figure out if there is an ideal job out there for me, I’m just going to go with the flow. Keep putting myself out there and applying and keep believing that I am doing what I am meant to be doing and to be content with that.

J and I are going to be here for at least another year or so definitely so I really want to find a job that makes me shine and makes me feel like I am making a difference. One which doesn’t make me feel like I want to slam my face into my bed post every.single.morning when my alarm goes off. That’s fair, right ?

So today I am calling on all those prayers, thoughts, angels, good vibe type wishes that my emu necking is going to get me somewhere and that I will get a job that can teach me some new things and maybe a few life lessons, coz’ i’ve got loads of room for those! Oh and maybe something that will pop a smile on my dial!

Happy Tuesday Ya’ll !

Linking in with Jess for the ever lovely IBOT

The ACTUAL dreams I have

I’ve always been a bit of a crazy dreamer – as in the actual, lay head down on pillow,cruise past the 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th stages of sleep and slip into the ole REM and wait for the images and scenarios to appear type dreams.

I remember at high school the girls in my group used to ask many a morning “Meagan, what was it last night, what did you dream of”. It became a bit or a morning show and tell – or rather vision and tell. I walked them through my dreams. I could/can more often that not remember smells in the air, colours of clothing, hair, eyes, I can describe my surrounds in fine detail. As soon as I start telling it, every details floods back into my mind.

I have always loved dreaming – it’s a bit of an escape for me – its just this other world that I have. That may seem rather odd, but wait till I tell you why…

Not only can I remember every detail, I can LUCID dream – and this happens A LOT.

Now what this means for me is – I can chose to do what I want in a dream, I can rarely pick the place that I am but I can always do what I want within whatever scenario appears in front of me.

Sometimes I’m dropped into these whack situations where I am being chased by a complete nut job trying to hack me into pieces with an axe – but I know its happening and I can RUN and I can JUMP and I can go faster than you can imagine. And I know I’m dreaming – so I just roll with it and try to get away.

Sometimes I am put on an island surrounded by sand and palm trees and beautiful aqua water – and I just go for a swim and laze around hoping I don’t wake up too soon.

When I was young I always remember wanting to be able to back flip, some of my friends at school could do this and I was always so envious but, try as a might, I could never master this. So when I found out I could lucid dream, guess what I did everywhere I was.. that’s right. I BACK FLIPPED. Every. Single. Night. No matter where I was. This was pretty awesome for me and which led me to the thought that surely after doing it so many squillions of times in my dreams, I could definitely master this in real life. Well, guess again. I was/am sill as unco as ever.

I’m yet to master being able to change the place I am though, surely this should come to me as I get older as a prize for always being the “crazy girl who can flip everywhere she goes and relay the finest details of her dreams”.. that would be ULTIMATE!

Last night I dreamt I was on some sort of space battleship with a group of people and it was some crazy outer space version of “The Hunger Games” in which we all had to ‘blast’ one another with our super charged space lasers. Trust me, I’m thinking “what the” as much as you are.

We all had this common area where we went for lunch and no one could hurt anyone and then straight after lunch BANG, back into the game.

I remember the ship going upside down and I could see the sun blazing in the far distance, this giant fiery ball and I remember how it looked and I was thinking WOW that’s pretty neat. Ha ha, completely random? Yes, I concur!

There is a downfall to all this dreaming business though – I’m always TIRED, mentally. Now this may be coincidence but I honestly feel it’s due to the fact I am so active in my mind of the night. Constantly on the go, running from baddies, sipping piña coladas on the beach. Its tough you know.

C’est la vie though, I love my dream world!

Do you remember your dreams?

Any suggestions on what I might be able to try in my next Lucid dream?

Linking in with Jess for IBOT